Me and the Bull

Recently, I have realized that there are higher virtues than commitment. I watched the light crawl towards the shadows in my room. The humid atmosphere was filled with the hustle and bustle of people rushing home after a tiring day. Despite the noise, I can only feel an acute sense of loneliness.

I could not fathom such longing for things to be different from the way they are.The dream to reach for what I always wanted escapes me sometimes. I try to deny that I merely want and do not feel the aching need and immerse my self in music and mosaic because I have never known any other way to relieve the silence haunting my soul.
Perhaps, I am waiting for the impossible. For the soul I sought will never find me. He will never know that I lived under the shelter of shadows just like him, hiding the truth because it is easier to deny. Those seemingly vacant eyes will never find out how much I understood his belief that contradictions and yearnings are just void of grey shades. He will never realized that I saw colors through him, every hue mocking me with its clarity and hitting me with a sharp longing.

Aristotle said that happiness is the end most sought for. Of course, he probably referred to that happiness beyond the measly glee brought about the novelty or youth or the fleeting gladness of temporality. But philosophical abstractions notwithstanding, things are often simpler than they seem: When you don't think you are happy, you probably aren't.